Pride-tastic

Last weekend was Pride down in Denver. It meant 4 days of relaxing, cocktailing with friends, and steeping myself in pure gayness. 2 days by the pool. 1 day at the Pride Festival, dancing and seeing familiar faces. 3 nights going out on the town. All in all, a very good getaway weekend. It was nice not having to fight my boss for time off too. *evil grin*

Highlights:

• Seeing Romaine and meeting her partner and baby
• Getting to do a day of Pride with Mandy and Teel
• Lounging by the pool with Jerry, Adam, and Squiddy - it'd been too long
• Going out dancing with Adam and Squiddy
• As always, spending time with Scotty, Craig, and Kalley
• Getting drunk with Chad in Civic Center Park - and dancing about to Martha Walsh!
• Reconnecting with myself and remember why I do what I do
• Hearing that Denver now hosts the 7th largest Pride celebration in the country

We didn't go crazy like we have in the last two years, and that was just fine by me. Not everyone could be there, and though we missed some folks, we still had a blast. I feel like a person again. I had some down time from work that wasn't connected to a doctor's appointment, meeting, or conference. I got to stare at hoards of hunky men in very little clothing. I got to spend time with really good friends. I got my tan back. What more could a girl ask for?

And Squiddy and I will be heading down again for the 4th of July, as we have tickets to the True Colors Tour at Red Rocks. Look out kids, I'm gonna be at full gay strength again!

Happy Gay Marriage Day!

I had a phone call yesterday from my friend Rod in San Diego. He called me 16 minutes before most folks could get a license. It's a good day to be gay. I have to believe that the voters in California will have the sense NOT to vote for the amendment to the state constitution, and the marriages performed between today and election day will not be invalidated. Please please please.

I have also completed 7 days at my new job. All is going well. We're coping with a filing system that was...problematic. Even considering I've spent too much time coping with someone who didn't do anything for at least 6 months, I heart my new job. I already knew that I would love my new boss, Nell. My coworker Tracey is a hoot too, and I already knew her by virtue of her husband. We're rocking and rolling in the office. The files are almost done, and it's on to training development now.

In other words...life is good once again. MandyFish will be here tomorrow(ish), Pride is this weekend, and my gay batteries will soon be recharged fully. Who knew that June could bring such bliss!? The money crunch is on, but all else is "all speed ahead." I even got to help facilitate a SafeZone session tonight for a high school camp on campus. Bright kids with smart questions. There is once again hope for America, folks.

Yes, boys and girls...it's a good day in the Rainbow Kingdom.

Here we go!

Today is my last day at IT. I'm currently sitting in Orientation resetting passwords. Yesterday I got most of my office boxed and moved out. I've backed up my computer, exported my iTunes purchases, and copied all my IT files to a server where my coworkers can access them. I've done everything I can do to get them ahead, and most things are done up through the middle of August. In short, I'm all set to go today.

Earlier this week I had dinner with my new boss, Nell. For 4.5 hours. We had a ball, and talked about some of the things we'd like to do, changes that need to happen, and where to begin. I'm just getting more and more excited about the job and the challenges it will bring. We're going to be doing a heck of a lot. As Nell put it, we're gonna be shakin' and bakin'.

I'm REALLY looking forward to new adventures, and I can't wait to share them with all of you! Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Empress Airlines flight 201 with service to the 4th floor of Old Main and continuing on to the future. Please fasten your seatbelts in preparation for take off, and make sure your tray tables and seat backs are in their full upright and locked position. We hope you'll sit back, relax, and enjoy the flight. We know our flight crew will.

Life updates

• I have 3 days, 2 hours, and 55 minutes left with IT. But who's counting? This week is doing its best to crush my soul, largely due to Orientation and trying to organize my office, files, etc. Oh yeah...and pack 12.5 years worth of crap. I'm refusing to give in. My office aide is helping with this greatly. She's treating this like Hanukkah, and I'm getting little gifts and surprises every day. Janet doth rock!
• I'm already getting email requests for my new job, though I have no idea what to do with them. Nell (my new boss) assures me they will wait until Monday, and I'll know what to do with them soon enough. I'm not used to not knowing things, but I'm looking forward to the learning curve. I'm sick like that.
• I am currently without TV. It seems my Dish Network receiver has had a hard drive failure that can't be fixed. They're sending me a replacement that should arrive no later than Thursday. It's one thing to be without current shows. What has me fuming (and sobbing) is the loss of some of the shows I had saved long term. In addition to the last few episodes of various series I watch, I'm losing some of the documentaries and news specials about Matt. Things I can't replace.
• Summer is underway, and I finally believe we might just possibly perhaps be beyond the days of snow. I won't swear to it, but I'm crossing my fingers. The yard got its first mowing of the season (thanks Squiddy!), and I'm wearing sandals again. A little more sun and I'll be able to wear shorts with more confidence.
• Pride is just around the corner. So are the summer camping trips. And the True Colors concert at Red Rocks on July 5th. With the new job, I must just get to have a social life this summer.

These are the important updates I can think of.

Ch- ch- ch- changes...

As some of you are aware, I recently applied for a new job as the Assistant to the Associate Vice President for Diversity at the University of Wyoming. This morning I was offered and accepted the position, and will begin my new job on June 9th. I admit to being a bit nervous as I have worked at Information Technology for the last 12.5 years, and have only worked here since my sophomore year of college. At the same time, I'm VERY excited about about this new direction in my life.
My new position will involve assisting with diversity training, committee work, and helping with diversity efforts on campus. This is the next step in making my passion my profession, and I'm looking forward to it! This is all happening very quickly, and there will be a decent learning curve for me. I'm leaving today at 12:30pm for a long Memorial Day weekend in Denver, and am so glad to have something to celebrate in addition to taking some much-needed down time. My email address and cell phone number will not be changing. I'm going to be very busy over the next while, first in trying to make things as easy on IT as possible and then in trying to learn a brand new job. Thanks for your patience if I'm less available for a bit. ;) And thanks for the love and support so many of you have given over the last few months. You all mean the world to me, and I can't wait to share with you all the new adventures down the road.

Today's lesson - if you do something you love, you'll never work a day in your life. (Yeah, it's not a BGJ original, but fits nicely, I think.)

Highs and lows

I've often heard life described as a roller coaster. Sometimes it feels more like a helicopter, shooting up and down without much forward motion. I had several posts floating in my brain, and most of them are positive. Then I opened my news today and wanted to cry. All of the posts are timely, so here's a quick summary:

• Milestones: I recently hit 300 posts (this is #302). It's a fun milestone, and I hope everyone has enjoyed reading my thoughts, rants, and adventures as much as I've enjoyed posting them. Thinking about my posts has taught me a great deal about life and myself, and I hope some of the "lessons" have applied to you all as well. Comment more often, so I know what you're thinking too!
• Speak up, speak out: The Diversity Summit on Monday went well, I think. 85 people sat in a room for 6 hours for the first annual President's Diversity Summit. There were students, staff, faculty, and administrators. I've not heard any negative feedback, but there are a few folks I want to specifically ask. If nothing else, I think we got people talking, and that was the most important part to us.
• The future's so bright: I went and spoke to a group of students at the high school yesterday. I think it went well, and I managed to keep around 8 teenagers engaged and talking for 90 minutes. Who knew?! Straight kids, not so straight kids. Allies and a Christian student who didn't really know what to expect but wanted to learn more and have a conversation. The high school GSA is going to meet with the Fellowship of Christian Athletes before the semester is out. Talking with them made it clear that there's hope. They're far more socially conscious than most adults, and only two of them had ever HEARD of the game "Smear the Queer." Change works!
• The weather fits my mood: After a few days of tantalizingly warm and sunny weather, the clouds are rolling in again. The same is true of my mood today. The Michigan Supreme Court ruled yesterday that because of the same sex marriage bans, governments and universities in the state are not ALLOWED to offer domestic partner benefits. Apparently it's not enough to keep us locked out of the chapel of love. On the off chance the dirty homo's can convince a government to treat them fairly and equally, we'll sneak it into the law. Not overly fair since the supporters of the ban specifically told voters they were only trying to prevent marriage, not benefits. There could be a federal appeal, but it's a huge step backwards. Any bets on whether the Republicans will use the term "activist judges" when the decision goes "their way?"

Today's lesson: The journey is never done, and whether it's a roller coaster, a rocket ship, or a helicopter, hold on and enjoy the ride.

Just a few more days

That's do-able, right? I know that students are in the throes of Finals stress. Papers, tests, projects, presentations. Staff on campus feel this same stress. Partly because students have a tendency to scream at us as a result of their stress.

My life is no different right now. I just finished up with AIDS Walk and Drag Queen Bingo. There's still a fair amount of paperwork to do for that, and last night I made the final arrangements for the board's "thank you" dinner for Monday. Today I have at least a 3 hour meeting for PACMWA. We're deciding how to give out almost $40,000 today. As chair, I'm running the meeting, and have spent the last week processing and reviewing grant applications.

Monday is the President's Diversity Summit, which I'm also planning. The facilitator flies in on Sunday. The RSVP list is at 75. It was originally supposed to be about 50 people. I'm expecting 85 by the time we're done. We've had to change dates 3 times. The catering is ordered, the A/V arrangements have been made, the rooms are reserved, and I think we've thought of everything. I have to print the handouts and coordinate name tags with the President's Office. While I'm excited about the event and the chance to get so many important people at the table to talk about diversity, I'm ready for the semester to be D-O-N-E, done.

There are a few other irons in the fire causing me extra work and stress right now, but for the moment I have to keep my cards close. More info will be coming soon, I promise. Add to this a host of friends with stress and drama in their lives who have turned to me for help, a stack of housework, back problems, and perpetual singehood, and you have a recipe for a nervous breakdown. Fortunately, I have amazing friends who remind me of my own advice: left foot, right foot, repeat as needed.

The point of all this: there are just a few more days until the worst of my stress is behind me. The trick is to break it down into parts. Focus on the first step. Worry about left foot first. Right foot can come tomorrow. You don't have to do it all at once.

Milestones

Well, I'm mostly back among the land of the living, so it's time for an update on AIDS Walk. My feet are still in a lot of pain, and have large deep tissue blisters. 6 inch heels will do that to you when you stand on your feet for 5 hours one night and turn around and do another 3 hours the next morning. The new corset did its job well, though some of the boning poked through fabric. The puncture marks and cuts are healing nicely, and aren't infected. As Livi said, "if you have to suffer for beauty, then we must be gorgeous!"

But none of that is what's really important, is it? What's important is that we raised over $20,000 on Saturday. This means we've raised more than $100,000 since the Walk was created 7 years ago. What's important is that bingo was packed to standing room only, and that people donated $4300 in 4 hours. What's important is that we can continue to support people living in the state with HIV, and that we can help make life a little bit easier for our fellow citizens.

What's most important are the hearts and minds we touched. The 100 HIV tests we did at the clinic. Getting new people signed up for assistance through the state and federal programs. Getting representatives from the state government involved to help spread the word throughout the next year. Making people aware that HIV is in Wyoming, and that people need to protect themselves.

Today's lesson: Making a difference is worth a few blisters and open wounds. Go do it!

Stamp out stigma!

It's here - AIDS Walk Week, that is. The walk is Saturday, and registration opens at 9am in the Union . The opening ceremonies kick off at 11am, including our keynote speaker Secretary of State Max Maxfield. Drag Queen Bingo is back again too; this year we're out at the HoJo and the doors open at 6pm - the show starts at 7pm.

This means it's time to shave my...everything...again. You don't fully appreciate the social stigma against women and hair until you find yourself shaving your toes and the tops of your feet. I've been making new jewely all week too. Raising pledges. Collecting prizes. Meeting after meeting. Hanging dresses. Learning new numbers and developing a choreography plan. Charging walkie talkies. So much to do, and so little time to do it!

There is a huge amount of time and energy that goes into making something like AIDS Walk happen. And truth be told, it's an honor to go through the extra work and stress. It feels good to make a difference in the lives of people I know and total strangers. There's a definite thrill that comes from seeing the final tally at the end of the walk and knowing that it was all worth while.

This is something important, not only to me but to those I care about. It's something I've been connected to and affected by for a long time. I remember the first paper I wrote about AIDS, back in 9th grade. (First person to do the math and mention the year gets their head shaved!) I remember being trained as a peer educator and counselor when I was a senior. My mom had to sign a special permission slip, because we were going to talk about condoms. That's where I met someone who was HIV positive for the first time.

Today I have several folks in my life who are HIV positive. Heidi and Isaac - our keynote speakers for the walk, times 2. Bob - my drag mother and hero. Robert - one of my favorite bartenders in Denver. Walt - a former coworker. Jason - one of the founders of AIDS Walk. The two Mary's - amazing women I met through AIDS Walk. The list goes on, and these are the people who are open about their sero-status.

There are also a whole host of people I know and care about who are not or cannot be open about their HIV or AIDS. Some of them are newly diagnosed. Some of them have known for a few years. Some of them contracted it because a partner cheated on them and brought it home. Some of them had unsafe sex knowingly, while others had a condom break. The bottom line is that it doesn't matter how, when, or why they were infected - they were, and there's some serious stigma out there that goes with a positive test.

Some worry about losing their job, though it's illegal to fire someone because they're positive. It would still mean a lengthy, costly, and public fight to try to keep it. Some worry about losing family and friends, though some already have. The looks, the stares, the whispers...that's all stigma. You'd think that in 2008, knowing what we do about the disease and how it's transmitted, that we wouldn't have to deal with bias like this. But we do, and that's the theme of this year's walk: "Be a friend, not afraid. Stamp out stigma."

Please join me on campus for the walk. Please come to bingo, or the "There's Got to be a Morning After" Drag Brunch at the Cavalryman on Sunday from 11am to 2pm. If you're already booked, that's okay. Perhaps you could sponsor me by pledging a donation to the walk. If nothing else, please take a moment to examine your own hearts and minds. People who are HIV+ aren't bad people, and they don't deserve scorn, ridicule, or harassment.

To learn more about HIV in Wyoming and around the world, watch this video I put together for last year's walk. It's about 13 minutes long and will probably make you cry, but it's far too important that we learn to respect ourselves and protect ourselves...and help those in need. (http://students.uwyo.edu/jimosbrn/aids.htm)

Today's lesson: People are people. Period. Treat them as such. Period.

The Adventures of Hooker Dream and Slut Magic

One of my friends is having some serious relationship problems. He and his partner are needing to take a step away, create some space to make decisions, talk things through, etc. Last night he showed up at the house and is staying with me for a few days. Some of our mutual friends have commented "you're such a good friend." He's thanked me profusely and it got me thinking - what about this is so out of the ordinary?

It's certainly not the first time my house has been a shelter/hostel/time out/safe space. When my sister's first engagement went south in a hurry and she had to get out of her apartment, she moved into mine. MandyFish and Nerdy have crashed at Ruby Slippers before. Levi (and sometimes Gretchen) lived with me for over a year! And several others have been on the "I might show up" list over the years. I can't imagine ever telling members of "my family" that they couldn't stay with me when they hit rough times. Everyone deserves a place to feel safe. Period.

That being said, I know not everyone is in a place where they could do something like this. Some wouldn't want to be near to potential drama. Some don't have the space. No doubt there will be challenges and it'll be a strain from time to time. To me, that's called life. I grew up with next to nothing but was always taught to share what you have and do what you can. Whether it's for friends, family, or strangers. Helping people when you can is what it's all about, right?

Last night my temporary roomie announced that we needed nicknames. I shall be known as Hooker Dream and he shall be called Slut Magic. No particular reason or story, just something fun in the face of something that isn't. I'm sure the adventures shall commence forthwith, and there will be laughing, learning, and crying. It's what I like to call life. People are messy sometimes, and life certainly is.

Today's lesson(s): Do what you can for others in need, whatever that might be. Do what's right, not what's easiest. And remember to find humor anytime and place you can. The good times wouldn't feel so good if we didn't also feel the lows once in a while.

A fab gay post coming soon

Hello faithful reader...or random strangers. There is an inspiring, motivating, and giddy post coming about the Bear Dinner very soon. I had planned to type it up tonight, but I'm tired. The Squid and I were in the car at 5:05am today, after a fantastic weekend! Another low-key tame weekend centered around an amazing event for an amazing cause. So many stories, but they shall have to wait.

287 was open this morning, so we snuck in while the rest of the roads were closed. I was at work on time, and spent my lunch hour at the new clinic location for Laramie Reproductive Health. The move happened this weekend and we open back up tomorrow. It looks amazing. I hung a few posters and put a few boxes worth of meds in the closet.

Back for another 4.5 hours of work. I did steal the time for a quick dinner before going to the AIDS Walk Meeting. Back to the clinic to make sure they were done and didn't need more help. Fortunately, they accomplished the impossible today, and it's ready to go! So I carried all the luggage in to discover Turbo is sick.

Puppy laundry, dinner, baths...then I can unpack. Who knows...I might even get to do my own laundry yet tonight. So...the inspired, passionate post will have to ferment in my brain a little longer. In the mean time:

We are home safe. The dinner was incredible. Exciting things are going to happen. More info soon.

Today's lesson: Know when to stop. Take a moment for yourself. Breathe. Not everything has to happen at once. There's a lot to do this time of year. Pace yourself. It's a marathon, not a sprint. Breathe again. Repeat as necessary.

Dancing with a Voluptuous Star

Okay, I admit I delayed posting this to give my Barack Obama post some extra airtime. It was a serious post, but now it's back to gay gushing!

The latest season of Dancing with the Stars started on St. Patty's day. The uber-queen in me goes giddy for the sequins, tuxes, and almost over-the-top costumes. The amateur dancer in me wants to cha cha and foxtrot for a crowd, especially with a studly professional wearing the yummiest of outfits. When they announced the new cast, I knew I was hooked and that this season is likely to be pure candy for me.

Extra hunky men. Iconic women. And a few twists, that make me want to kiss ABC. They've been fabulous in the past, hosting men and women of all ages. From Jerry Springer to Jane Seymour, and Scary Spice to Mario Lopez. They've included people of color, athletes, actresses, and Hollywood icons. I was floored when Heather Mills, who wears a prosthetic leg, did a cartwheel. I was just as impressed when she fell on a different night, and not only got back up and finished like a champ but came back with renewed determination.

This season, as hot as some of the male celebs might be, my out of the gate favorites are some of the ladies. What gay man could resist rooting for a figure skating legend like Kristi Yamaguchi? I have long been a fan of Marlee Matlin, and have huge respect for the brass she's shown. I am going to LOVE watching her push herself and adapt to music she can't hear, and laughing at her AMAZING sense of humor. I can't imagine trying to dance by the feel of the beat and the count alone. And then there's Marissa Jaret Winokur.

She's best known for her Tony award-winning performance as the curvy and bossomy Tracy Turnblad in Hairspray on Broadway. She's now taking to the ballroom. She's the shortest contestant in the show's history, not even reaching five feet tall. She's also the biggest gal in six seasons, and they couldn't have picked a better rep for the bigger girls. She makes no apologies about her size, and expects none from someone who notes her girth. "It's just the way my body is, and that's okay." She quips "I'm here to represent all the girls who aren't a size 2!" And she does it with SUCH personality, energy, and heart. You can't help but love her!

She represents part of what has been missing on TV and in the media. She's a regular woman, who doesn't starve herself to fit into the latest runway fashions. She's got big hair and makes no bones about the fact that she's positively giddy to be ballroom dancing like the stars she grew up idolizing. Did I mention she's got some talent as well? In her first dance, she drew a standing ovation, and nearly endless screams from the audience. She looked GREAT doing the cha cha in her plus-sized sequined electric blue gown.

I can only hope Ms. Marti Gras looks and moves half as well as she did on night 1. I love that shows like Ugly Betty exist. They remind the not-so-pretty, the not-so-popular, and the not-so-thin folks out there that they're okay too. That they can DO. They can BE. That it takes all shapes and sizes. And colors. And sexualities. And religions. That we should always be proud of who we are, and always reach for the stars. Dream big and take risks. Even if you're trying to change or improve, LOVE YOURSELF.

It's one of the hardest lessons, and is one I struggle with every day. I think we all do in our own ways. In the end, I think that's why I love Dancing with the Stars so much. And the Olympics. The Oscars. They give us hope, and show us stories of real, everyday people who have achieved incredible feats despite overwhelming odds. They show us dreams DO come true. And so I say "Dance on, ladies, and kick some ass!" Show us what you can do, and better yet, show yourselves!

And if I have to watch sometimes shirtless hunks gyrating their hips in the process, I can suffer. ;) Speaking of curvy divas, I have one last gay gush. I've now been measured for a custom corset. It will be more comfortable, more durable, and MUCH more fabulous. Look out kids, Marti is planning to WOW at this year's Drag Queen Bingo (7pm, April 19th, Laramie Ho-Jo: more details to follow).

I'm here because of Ashley too

If you're on Spring Break and missed the buzz that's going around today, Barack Obama gave a speech on race today. It was in response to controversial comments made by Obama's clergy of choice. The internet is awash with comments that say the speech "will go down in history" and "wow." I heard clips today while driving back from my lunch hour, and the snippets were impressive, to be sure. The commentator on my gay radio station gushed "It's so good to hear someone finally SAY these things. It's important to actually HEAR them."

I walked into the office and my aide Janet said "have you listened to this yet?" She sent me a link, and I cued it up to play but paused it while I coped with a few tasks here and there. When I walked in a few minutes later, she was crying. A lot. At first I thought she'd gotten a call telling her someone had died. Suddenly I realized that she was still listening to the speech. "Is it really THAT good?" I asked her. As she blotted and dabbed with a Kleenex she just nodded.

So at the end of the day, I too watched the video. Being the emotional homo I am, I too cried. The radio host and Janet were right. It was SO refreshing to hear someone say what so many of us already know in our hearts. He talked candidly about the anger so many Americans feel. And not just people of color. He rightly pointed out that we MUST remember the pain and problems of the past to understand the present and to perfect the future. He also talked about the anger many white Americans feel.

He was articulate, eloquent, and truly inspirational. Rather than distancing himself from someone who was becoming controversial, he addressed the issues behind it, and showed true leadership. He didn't blame anyone, and allowed everyone their own feelings while putting the issue in context. I can't think of any words other than "Brilliant!"

As my friends know, I've been hesitant to pick a favorite in the upcoming election. My official stance has been "as long as it's not a bat-shit crazy Republican, I'll be happy. I'll even take a non-bat-shit crazy Republican, as long as they're not what we've had for the last 8 years." Today, that has changed. I have not been so moved by ANY politician about ANY issue.

It's not just the words he used, as anyone can hire a speech writer. It was the raw leadership and wisdom he exuded. I can put my faith in someone who reasons this way, because they will look at an issue and address it honestly. Fairly. Not with PC political speech, or what will poll well. But honesty and integrity. That's the only way we can start to fix our country. To become the ideal we're supposed to represent. The spirit upon which we were born. The way I want to face problems. The way I want my niece and nephew to see America. A heritage they can be proud of.

Today is the day I cast my vote for Barack. But listen and read for yourself. Then decide for yourself. I'm certain you will at least be impressed.

Click here to watch the video and/or read the text.

Can't win for trying

I fear I can't go into much detail just yet, but I've reached a point where I can't win for trying at work. I've done everything that's been asked of me. I've dealt with ever-increasing workloads, expanded services, and next to no recognition. But I am paid decently and do my work well. My performance reviews even say so...for the most part. It's like beating my head against a wall.

Today's lesson...don't beat your head against the wall. Albert Einstein once said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Reach out for help when you need it. Stand up for yourself when necessary. You're a person first.

I'm SO gay this week

I know, "as opposed to any other week." This week I have a total of 4 panels for classes, with another one on Monday. Women's Studies x3 and a Nurse Practitioner class, then Counselor Ed on Monday. My boss makes it very difficult to be out of the office this much, and it means I work straight (har har) through lunch. Or rather, I use my lunch hour to go be the token homo. On the one hand, this is a raging pain in the ass and reminds me why I am so disgusted with my job these days. Sometimes you just don't feel like walking into a room full of strangers and telling them your deepest darkest secrets and how tough it was growing up queer. Tired of being on display.

And yet, there's the other hand - the reason I will ALWAYS do the panels. I've already had a few people come up to me and thank me (and the other panelists too) for sharing our stories. Some of them have looked at things in a new way. Some of them now understand better what happened to Matt, despite the lies running through the local rumor mill and 20/20. There have also been one or two students in the classes who I caught averting their eyes at just the right moment, and I know they are the student I was as a freshman: the scared, closeted person aching to come out but not yet ready to make that terrifying first step.

And that's what it's all about for me. Making the world a safer place for my fellow queers. For those who can't fight the fight yet. For those who've lost the fight along the way. For the junior high student in California shot in the head because he started wearing makeup and dressing more effeminately. For his parents, who this week decided to donate his organs so that others might live where hate ended his life too soon. Nobody should have to make that decision because of hate.

I speak out because I can. It's safe for me to do so. Or rather, it's safeR for me to do so. I'm 6'4" and too many pounds, and no longer have to fear losing family or friends or jobs if I shoot my mouth off. There's still danger, as I paint a target on myself by telling a room full of strangers I like the boys! But it's a risk I take, because someone must.

Today's lesson: speak up or out about something if you can. Make the world a better place for someone else, just because it's the right thing to do. Create change. Open minds... even if it's your own.

The scariest man running...

"I believe it is a lot easier to change the Constitution than it would be to change to the word of the living God, and that’s what we need to do is to amend the Constitution so it’s in God’s standards rather than change God’s standards." – Mike Huckabee - January 14, 2008

Apparently, Huckabee has decided not to campaign on the "Separation of Church and State" platform. I know, not really news, but this is one of the most frightening things I have ever heard a politician say publicly. Perhaps what is so frightening is that there is a large percentage of the U.S. population who not only agree, but would see nothing wrong with the statement.

Folks, if we follow the last 8 years of blunders, lies, and hatred with this nimrod, I'm burning down the house, quitting my job, and selling my car to buy a ticket to Holland. I'll live on my sister's couch before I go through this guy. I suppose I could live with McCain. I don't know that I care if it's Hillary or Obama, as long as we're done with Republican asshats. (Please note I am not stating all Republicans are asshats.)

Today's lesson: I will come and personally kick the ass of any of my friends who don't VOTE this year. I don't care who it's for, just flipping VOTE!

PS...did I mention I'll be wearing my size 14, 6-inch high heels when I kick your ass?

I laughed so hard a little pee came out...

(2 points if you can tell me where the title comes from.)

I don't often post videos, but these gems are too good to pass up. Thanks to my office aide Janet for letting me know about the hi-larious bits of The Colbert Report I had missed. I watch The Daily Show on Comedy Central religiously, but only catch Colbert once in a while. I missed gay gold, kiddies! The first segments of his new bit "Better Know a Lobbyist" focused on the Executive Director of the Human Rights Campaign.

They are the largest GLBT political action committee in the country. While I don't always agree with their methods, philosophies, or strategies, I believe they do good work and accomplish a lot of good things. And their ED hit this interview out of the park. It does a GREAT job of showing just how ridiculous some anti-gay arguments have been in recent times. Tip of the hat to Colbert, as well!

It's 2 parts, and they're both worth it. I've embedded them below and hope you enjoy! (If YouTube pulls these specific links/uploads, just search for "Colbert" and "Lobbyist.")

It's official...

...I think I might live. The new super-antibiotic seems to be kicking in nicely. I figured it would, since it involves taking one pill a day for only 7 days. Beefy, no? The steroid is also doing its job, as I'm not nearly as vertigo-y as I was. Sorry Uncle Freddy, this here homo isn't hell-bound just yet. ;) In other news...

• I have a hawt date tonight with the Squid. Dinner and a movie, since theater tickets didn't pan out.
• Tomorrow we're celebrating Maggie's birthday. There are rumors of sushi. I think by then all my taste buds and olfactory receptors will be functioning, and it will be a happy celebration of her aging and my recovery. She reportedly reads my blog, but is a dirty lurker. So I'm calling her out publicly. Heh.
• I filed my taxes today, and 5 hours later got an email that Uncle Sam accepted my demands...er...paperwork. The refund should allow me to pay off the last of the medical bills...and hopefully fix the hot tub!
• The Matthew Shepard Foundation's annual "Bear to Make A Difference" Dinner is coming up at the end of March. I've volunteered as a table captain again this year (as has Cory!), and my table is filling up nicely. Squidly and the O'Malleys will be with me, as will Jerry! Scotty and Craig are rumored to be interested in coming again this year too, so it should be quite the table of hooligans. If you're interested in coming, let me know. Tickets are $175, though $150 of that is tax deductible. :)
• I've burned through too much sick leave in the last month to be able to deliver flowers on Villain-tine's Day this year. This saddens me greatly, but I'm gonna help out down at the shop after hours whenever I can. I still want to be able to claim being a gay florist one day out of the year!

That's about it for the Rainbow Kingdom update. Join us again soon for my next FAB-ulous rant or rave. Or both. ;)

Things I've learned while being sick

It is true, the Squid is a carrier of plague. I don't hold it against her, though. ;) Here are some things I've learned while I was sick:

• There are 6 episodes of Murder She Wrote on each weekday. I can watch 5 of them.
• Cough syrup with codeine is a happy thing.
• It doesn't take long before you've consumed enough orange juice that you don't ever want to drink it again. I reached that point after 1 gallon. I am almost done with gallon #4.
• I am not a fan of the blanket NyQuil throws over my brain. I am a fan of the sleep I can get thanks to the Big Q.
• My muscles ACHE from all the coughing.
• I miss being able taste things.
• It doesn't take long before you're tired of sitting upright so that you can breathe. Sleeping in this position is equally tiresome.

I am, however, getting better and expect to be at work tomorrow. And I still love the Squid. :) Thanks to all who have sent good wishes, delivered dinner (heart you Jess, get better soon!), or otherwise made me smile since contracting the plague. It means a lot!

My weekend has meaning!

The Universe is telling me to recharge my gay batteries. Imagine my glee when I woke up today and discovered that I'm watching sports this weekend. I even called C in Denver to let him know, as I know he'd be proud. It's time to watch the National Championships, ladies and gentlemen. Of US Figure Skating!

If you didn't know I was THIS gay, you haven't been paying attention. This afternoon NBC is showing the pairs and dance freestyle finals. Tonight is the ladies freestyle. Tomorrow night, the men take the ice. Sponsored by Smuckers and ADT Home Security. I was trying to explain how exciting this is to Squid over IM, though I don't know that I gayed her up enough to care much. I even wrote her a quick poem:

Repeat after me class...
Toe loop, salchow, axel, lutz.
Camel spin, sit spin, don't be a putz.
Double, triple, then a quad.
Hot men in spandex with rockin' bods.

To learn more about figure skating jumps, click here. To follow the championships online, click here.

So why is that we gay men love figure skating? I can only speak for myself, but I remember watching skating with my mom. The Olympics were favorite times, as she and I got to spend time together. Watching the pageantry and elegance. The fantastic costumes and the intritcate choreography. Timed perfectly to all sorts of music. There was drama and tension. And there were stories.

In just one hour today, I've heard about skaters who have overcome lung cancer and watched the final couple in the pairs competion as he proposed...just after they finished skating and before they had their scores. They won the silver medal. I listened as they explained the couple who won today in their first appearance in the senior nationals, won last year in the first appearance in the junior nationals. No couple has ever done that. People skating with injuries. Examples of good sportsmanship. Overcoming incredible odds to be there. Dedicating a performance to someone who didn't live long enough to see it themselves.

There are records set, and sometimes perfection. But most of the time, it's the struggle for perfection. That's why Mom and I loved it so much. We related. We fall short, but sometimes...it's perfect and moving and beyond description. It's watching people create new things. Dick Button, the "old guy" who comments on skating most of the time, was the first person to land a triple jump in competition back in 1952. Kurt Browning, one of my favorite male skaters, landed the first quad in 1988.

They're amazing athletes, requiring gymnastic skill, flawless balance, impressive stamina, AND artistic ability. Performance and showmanship. Determination and pageantry.

So what's so hard to understand? It's about the essence of being a gay man. And there's men in tight clothing. And many of them are gay. And there are sequins. And hair stylists. And over the top makeup. Feathers. And people who can follow a beat. Yeah. TOTALLY GAY. And totally FABulous. This weekend I'll be watching TV with my mom. I'm sure she's still watching. She wouldn't let a little thing like death keep her from this mother - gay son bonding time, even if it wasn't okay that I was gay. Watching figure skating with her WAS.

Anyone wanna buy me a trip package to the Worlds in LA? ;) Oh...and C's response was "You're a mess."