Tuesday, December 14, 2004

Brace yourselves for a very gay post

So I've (again) noticed a semi-interesting phenomenon of late. When one has been without physical companionship for certain length of time, the requirements for that which is visually appealing seem to lessen. In laymen's terms, when you haven't gotten any in far too long, a good stiff breeze can turn you on. I think there's even a corollary which states the longer it's been, the lower your standards go.

Now at first this was an amusing thought in my head only, as I found myself saying "Well, I could go there. It's not so bad." Then I was introduced to someone's boyfriend at the grocery store. As Mandy and I walked inside I commented "Ooo...he's CUTE." She stopped short and looked at me, wailing "Noooooo!" and shaking her head for emphasis. Now, I admit that it's possible we having differing tastes in some men, but generally we agree. (Brad Pitt is mine, Man, so back off, bitch!) And that's when I knew it was true:

I'm reaching desperation. You bitches better find me a man and soon. Your Empress has spoken. What are you doing still reading? Get out there and get me a boyfriend! Go! Now! Faster, dammit!

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